I've been really stressed lately, and I just don't know why. This weekend was really stressfull and I know why, so I tried to do several stuff to get over it. As a result, I got a stressfull weekend and a big hangover for sunday. One of the things that resulted of this state of mind is that lately I don't feel like blogging. Since I like blogging and this kind of feelings is what usually precedes a melancholic/depressive state, I decided to fight it, so I'll blog, just not the usual stuff I write here, but the useless things about me or my life or what I think or what I just fill like spit it out, the useless crap that nobody gives a shit about. So sorry, but you'll probably dislike the kind of stuff I'm going to blog about. I wanted to see a movie, but not a mind-thrilling one, yet I wouldn't stand to see that stupid teenage nonsense movies crap (yeah, I'm also in an irritant mood), so I decided to see "Children of Men". Maybe it has something to do with my mood thingie, but after all the movie turned out not to be what I expected - while completely biased like any production this big tends to be, I really found the movie to be really good, and I think you should see it (just don't blame me if you don't like it, please). It made me laugh and it made me cry, it had a somewhat coherent story. I left the theatre wanting to make babies. No, it had nothing sexual about it and I didn't came out of there wanting to get laid: I just felt like I really would love to do all the processes from deciding to finaly having a child. Not that any of that matters. Talking about children and having them and stuff related, I just saw a post on "Planeta Asterisco" (a Portuguese blogs aggregator) a post (sorry, this is being written offline so no links) about "beautifull woman" and stuff like that. Well, for me a really beautiful woman doesn't have to be phisicly beautiful at all: it just have to be nice. Not "nice" in the physical way, or "nice" like "well behaved" or something like that, no. Nice as in mind-thrilling - that kind of person that when you start talking to them and knowing them you just want to talk more and know'em more because they are interesting. Nice. And yes, of course I have aesthetic oppinions, and I have a sense of beautifulness. The thing is that I've learned not to give a damn about that "before", only "after". Meaning - if I know a woman that really fulfills the physical stuff it needs for me to find her to be attractive, with sex appeal and beautiful, I _can't_, and I mean it, consider her by that. Now, after knowing here, if she's someone I find interesting, then she's automaticly beautiful to me, and those other physical aspects will only make me think that "she's beatifull, and I really like the way she laughs" or stuff like that. Now, I also know that most people think this is bullshit, and I've already heard other people saying they have the same "definition" of beauty, but for most of those I've doubted and all of them that I can remember failed on their words at least once. So I know that you'll also think "bullshit" but I don't really give a crap - I know it's not bullshit :-P. I really think that everything would be way easier if people didn't have fear of telling the truth. An example of that, picking the line of thoughts, is a friend of mine that doesn't try to pull romantic strings of the whole issue and just tells "I like woman that have one little exotic characteristic". And he's not bold about it: I saw him telling it in front of the person with an exotic characteristic he digged at the time. Congratiulations - you tell the truth and don't give a crap. Another guy I know doesn't start dating with a girl without having sex with her first, because he won't be dating her if "she's not good at bed". Now, while I find that completely stupid (and childish, and I don't believe he'll feel the same for much longer), and I told him so, at least he's frank about it. Cool. Now, now, I was going to write about four or five more things that came to my mind while I was writting this but they are now vanished for my mind. Well, at least I'm starting to feel like blogging - not bad. So, I'll stop here, smoke a cigar and go to bed, while listing to Ashram's latest album, "Shining Silver Skies" (if you don't know it, you should - go to their website to listen to one track), that I chose to be listening now to calm down the stupid stress. It's not working yet, but I believe it will be - and that's an improovement, right? Oh, BTW, if this looks like I'm searching for a girlfriend or whatever, I'm not. I don't believe in "looking for Love" (and I wouldn't be interested in a relation without Love), I only believe in just "falling in Love". Yeah, I also know that's a cliché nowadays, but - again - that's really how I feel. Oh, another two adedas... About the "beautiful" theme, I'm not talking about nothing but beauty itself. I mean, I find difficult to find someone beautiful if that person in not my friend (or in a path that could lead to friendship). The other thing is completely non-related, but since I'm heavy-thinking instead of sleeping, my mind was already somewhere else and I thought I should write this: I completely hate age, and how people relate age with maturity.